How To Initiate Sex: How 21 Women Initiate Sex

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When it comes to initiating sex, it's often assumed that it's the man's responsibility. However, in today's modern dating landscape, many women are taking the reins when it comes to initiating intimacy. We've spoken to 21 women to find out how they initiate sex and what works for them. From subtle gestures to direct communication, here's how these women are taking charge in the bedroom.

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Setting the Mood

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For many women, setting the mood is an important part of initiating sex. This can involve anything from lighting candles and playing soft music to wearing lingerie or engaging in flirty banter. "I like to set the mood by sending my partner a sexy text or wearing something that makes me feel confident," says Sarah, 28. "It's all about creating a sensual atmosphere that makes both of us feel desired."

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Non-Verbal Cues

Sometimes, actions speak louder than words. Many women use non-verbal cues to signal their desire for intimacy. This can include making prolonged eye contact, touching their partner affectionately, or initiating physical contact. "I like to start by cuddling up to my partner and making subtle movements to let them know I'm in the mood," says Emily, 25. "It's a way of communicating without having to say anything."

Direct Communication

Other women prefer to be more direct when initiating sex. This can involve simply asking their partner if they want to have sex or expressing their desire verbally. "I believe in being straightforward and honest about what I want," says Rachel, 30. "If I'm in the mood, I'll just tell my partner and see where it leads. It takes the guesswork out of the equation."


For some women, spontaneity is key when it comes to initiating sex. This can involve surprising their partner with a spontaneous make-out session or suggesting a spontaneous romp in an unexpected location. "I'm a big fan of spontaneity," says Jessica, 26. "I like to catch my partner off guard and inject some excitement into our sex life."

Initiating Through Foreplay

Foreplay can be a powerful tool for initiating sex. Many women use foreplay as a way to build anticipation and signal their desire for intimacy. This can involve anything from giving their partner a sensual massage to engaging in playful teasing. "I like to initiate sex through foreplay," says Lauren, 29. "It's a way of building anticipation and getting both of us in the mood."

Taking Charge

Some women enjoy taking charge in the bedroom and initiating sex by taking the lead. This can involve being the one to make the first move or guiding their partner in a way that communicates their desire. "I'm not afraid to take charge and initiate sex," says Ashley, 27. "It's empowering to be the one to make the first move and show my partner what I want."

In Conclusion

When it comes to initiating sex, there's no one-size-fits-all approach. Every woman has her own unique way of expressing her desire for intimacy. Whether it's through setting the mood, non-verbal cues, direct communication, spontaneity, foreplay, or taking charge, the key is to find what works for you and your partner. By understanding how these 21 women initiate sex, you can gain insight into the diverse ways in which women are taking charge in the bedroom.